Where are all the sunshine girls

I typically go to dialysis around 3:30 in the afternoon. Yesterday I was struggling after a weekend of dealing with fluid issues and so I asked if I could come in earlier than usual and they got me in around 11:15.

As I looked around the dialysis clinic yesterday I noticed how many people I didn't recognize. I noticed that there were very few there who's faces matched those of the people that filled those same chairs four years ago, even two years ago.

When I arrived four years ago I would see several elderly women who were coming off the machines or out in the waiting room awaiting their rides. We would chat and while no deep friendships formed we certainly engaged in many conversations. These women referred to themselves as the sunshine girls. They would meet up once every other month or so for a lunch on a Sunday.

About a year ago I moved my start time to about an hour later than it used to be and I really haven't seen the sunshine girls very much. Yesterday I assumed I'd see several of them based on my early start time, but there was only one sunshine girl there.

I knew one of the sunshine girls had passed away last year and another maybe 6 months before her, but there were about a dozen sunshine girls when I started... could it really be down to just one?

It's possible that some of the sunshine girls moved to first shift, but I know I've heard rumors of several deaths at our clinic in recent months, I just haven't been specifically aware of who had passed.

This also got me thinking about the ever changing staff at my clinic. Other than the manager, the receptionist, the social worker and two technicians, the staff is not the same as when I started. Since I began dialysis five nurses have left,  three or four regular technicians have left, we've gone through about a half dozen temporary technicians, our dietician has left and we've had at least three financial aid coordinators.

I don't know that I have any deep or meaningful point, but certainly we lose people along the way... doesn't matter what we're involved in and it's not always death that takes these folks away from us, but we do lose people along  the way.

Maybe soon I'll get a new kidney and I'll no longer need dialysis myself. Maybe some other guy or gal who only just recently started dialysis will wonder what ever happened to that guy with the really cool blanket. Did I ever mention my cool blanket? Maybe that's a good topic for next time.

My name is Bil... And I have kidney disease.